Sunday 13 May 2012

Viewing



Early evening.  A Kenyan couple walking around an English Cul De Sac. Mrs. Adoyo is looking through some papers with houses for sale on them.

Mrs. Adoyo: Number 52. Here it is.

Mr. Adoyo rings the bell.  An older white woman answers the door.

Woman: NO RELIGION

Mr. Adoyo: Erm..We've come for the viewing

Woman: (stunned) The Body of Christ isn't here

Mr & Mrs Adoyo look at each other and then back to the woman.

Mrs Adoyo: (shows her a picture from her papers) Your house. It's for sale isn't it?

Woman: NO

Mr Adoyo: But Kevin Sanderson from the estate agents arranged it.

Woman: KEVIN

Mr & Mrs Adoyo: Yes

Man's voice from inside the house: (hushed tones) It's their messenger Margaret?

Woman: I suppose Kevin wants us to burn in eternal hell.

Man's voice: What do you mean US?

Mr Adoyo: There's obviously been a mistake.  I'll phone Kevin

Woman:  Going to strike us down is he?

Man's voice: (Shouting) HE'S NOT GOING TO STRIKE ME DOWN.  ERE. DID YOU KNOW WHEN MARGARET WAS AT SCHOOL SHE SOLD HER BIBLE TO MARY MCKENNA IN EXCHANGE FOR A BAG OF JELLY TOTS.

Mr and Mrs Adoyo look at Margaret

Angry she turns round and storms upstairs.  The sound of a slap can be heard.

Mr & Mrs Adoyo turn and walk away

Man's voice: OW.  TELL KEVIN SHE BEATS ME WITH THE NEW TESTAMENT ON A SUNDAY.